I Love Us 🖤
As we wrap up this month with blogs focusing on all things American Black Culture, I want you to take a moment and consider your favorite enjoyable thing about American black culture. Whether it is the versatility of our hairstyles and hair textures, our music, the food, our style of clothing, or even our language between each other. Like there are some things we just know and it doesn’t have to be verbalized. Like your mom giving you a side-eye, you and your friend making that connecting glance, and y’all both spot the same thing or the trash-talking during a game of spades or dominoes. It’s all a part of what makes us, who we are.
As Black History Month is coming to a close, we still have every day to celebrate who we are. No day or month on the calendar will change my gratefulness for being a proud black woman.
“Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.” Psalms 139:14 NLT
Black Culture is: Our Music
Music is powerful. Music moves your heart, mind, and soul and even changes your mood. Music is a way to connect with others and is such a vibe. To be honest, I have my best cleaning days when I turn on some music and find a good playlist.
In American Black Culture music is a staple at every event from family reunions to birthdays. Family reunions are filled with line dances because it isn’t a family reunion until you do the electric slide. And let’s not forget about birthdays -y’all know we are going to sing the Stevie Wonder redemption of the song.
Even when you are singing at church, the runs on a solo hit a little differently and run a little longer. We will remix a song and combine them all into one and before you know it you have a 3 min song that turned into a 15-minute song. (But who’s counting?!!!) lol - me. 😂
The fact that we have our Black National Anthem, 🎶Lift Every Voice and Sing. 🎶
I mean - what more can I say!
From hip hop, rap, r&b, the quiet storm, blues, reggae, gospel, etc. - there’s music for everyone.
A good drum beat even without music - you can feel it in your soul.
Whether I’m saying, “It’s 7 o clock on the dot” or, “ You make me happy, this you can bet… someone will always jump in and finish the song.
I’ll leave you with this fun fact about my favorite artist and see if you can guess the artist.
“How you gon' win when you ain't right within”.
Our music is a part of American Black History.
Black Culture Is…
I’m often asked by others where are you from? In which, I’ll reply I’m from Dallas. This question is usually followed up with another question, nowhere are you really from? In which I say I’m from Dallas and my parents were born and raised in Dallas. While I know the ancestry test is a trend to trace your heritage, in actuality American Black culture is my heritage.
Like honestly, think about how lit we are! We have genres of music, family reunion traditions, black card revoked (like your black card can be revoked) and so much more. Just to even think about acronyms the whole quote “you good?” has so many meanings depending on how you say it.
Stay tuned, this month because I’m focusing on us! We are our culture! I’m embracing it, but also sharing some of my own experiences from the church, scars on the knees (we all have our stories) music, family functions, the intensity of games for those who can’t play spades, and to top it off the silent facial expressions (where we all know what we are saying.
“Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.” Psalms 139:14 NLT
Play the Cards Dealt
I had the pleasure of playing some card games with friends this weekend. We played one particular game called Phase Ten. To win the game you had to complete 10 different phases. Some phases were easy and some were much harder. Playing phase 10 was fun, but also frustrating. Some rounds you were able to complete a phase in one round, while in other phases it would take several rounds to get to the next phase.
It was frustrating to see other people moving on to the next phase, while you were still stuck on the same phase. When someone was stuck (I’m the person stuck 🙃) on a particular phase - we termed the phrase, “You can only play the cards dealt.”
It’s a term that became very true of the game, but is also applicable to life. Life is great; however, some days or even seasons it feels like you are just playing the cards life dealt when things happen which are completely out of our control.
Like in the game of Phase 10, some things are dealt which aren’t fair but continue to weather that phase with grace until the next phase. The next phase may be the best season of your life!
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. Isaiah 43:2 (NIV)
My superpower is…I am Me
It’s so important to show up everywhere you go as your true authentic self. Others can benefit when you are you - even at work. I started a new role last year and I’ve received tons of positive feedback on how others enjoy working with me because despite what happens around me every day I decide to show up as me.
For example, I love to have fun so when I lead huddles for the team, I always plan a five-minute game before we jump into the daily topics. We also have a shared board we update every day, so I started commenting under everyone’s post to say nice things and adding funny gifs or memes. Now others on my team have joined in. Those two examples may seem small, but they can make someone else day when you show up as you!
While there are billions of people on the planet, there is no one exactly like you.
No one has the same DNA strand like you.
I say this often, I can give every blogger I know the same blog topic, and our blogs will all be different. That just shows the beauty in the importance of being authentically you.
I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. Psalms 139:14
The Stage Is Set
I posted a picture on my timeline yesterday of the Cowboys stadium before the game occurred. The picture was captioned, “The Stage Is Set”.
From observing the picture, it was the subtle quietness that occurred before the game. They were anticipating what was to come once the stadium was filled with people.
When I looked at the picture, it was a reminder for me of how hopeful we can be before the New Year starts which usually carries over at least until the first week of the New Year.
New Year’s Day, the stage is set for an amazing new year.
Yells - 2022 is our year!
We set our goals, have vision board parties, and then somewhere along the way “it” happens. We lose momentum and focus or we never initiate any of our plans. The entire stage can be set for an amazing year, but if there’s no action from us then there will be no progress.
Today is Ditch New Year's Resolution Day. I know it sounds like a made-up day, but by now some people have written their plan for the year and have never taken a step towards execution.
Don’t allow this to be you. 2022 can still be your year! Let’s get this done!
“Many plans are in a person’s heart, But the advice of the Lord will stand.”
Proverbs 19:21 NASB2020
She can Walk that Walk
Listen she can walk that walk!
2021 was a whirlwind! Some days I felt like I was literally hit by a bus. 😩 But the next day…I bounced back! I’ll give you my top 11 things from 2021.
- My relationship with God has grown. Y’all he loves me and he be talking to me because I talk to him.
- I traveled every month of the year - which I absolutely loved!
- I caught Rona 😩, but I’m grateful I didn’t have any severe symptoms. I was basically asymptomatic. 🙌🏽
- I received a new position at work.
- I learned not to be so hard on myself, particularly about my weight. I look amazing!!!
- I had my first self Publishing event!
- I have my first client to help with self Publishing!
- My friends and I had a dope photoshoot.
- I have accountability partners in so many areas of my life. S/o to my friends from DTA!
- I joined a new church! @social_dallas
- I colead a connect group at church.
Wow, so much more happened this year, but I couldn’t have done none of it without the grace of God on my life. I’m excited about 2022 and I’m expecting amazing things.Share one of your favorite memories from 2021!
Ready, Set, Go…
I was lying in bed one night last week pondering about the past year. While I’m grateful for this year, 2021 is a roller coaster of emotions for me and it’s not over yet. Initially, I couldn’t seem to get my balance with working out, traveling, writing a new book, starting a new position, and don’t forget there’s still this global pandemic going on. 🤯 I remember telling my therapist a few months ago I think I’m broken and she quickly reminded me that I wasn’t. 😫🤣🤣🤣
Fast forward to December and I finally feel like I found my rhythm. It only took 11 months 😫, but I’m here. For me, I had to add structure back into my life especially now knowing I’m working from home permanently. Structure for me the past couple of weeks is morning devotion, prayer time, gym, work, and then scheduled time after work for any projects. Woosah.
To be honest, some days, I still struggle to get out the bed so early, but I can say I feel so much better knowing I’ve spent time with God and completed my workout before logging into work. This has also helped tremendously with my energy level at work and my adjustment to day life savings time. Y’all it’s dark so early. 😩
For many of us as the year comes to an end and the new year approaches - we think of the goals we want to start for next year. I’ve learned, you can either wait until January 1st to start those goals or we can say ready, set, go and start those goals now! Starting today will give us a jump start of a couple of weeks on a new health goal, financial goal, or any type of accomplishment. We don’t have to wait for the calendar to say January 1st to work on ourselves, we can start now! 💯
Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert. KJV Isaiah 43:19
Balloons Be Poppin
Storytime: I used an air machine to blow up balloons a couple of weeks ago and there were a couple of times when I put too much air in the balloons and they popped.
This reminded me of what happens when you allow things to fester and continue to build up without dealing with them. Eventually, you feel like you are exploding because you have feelings and emotions which are unaddressed, and then like a balloon you pop.
Or lets say you are at a holiday party and you consume too much food and then your button pops on your pants. 😂
In both situations, overconsumption can be detrimental. Learn to deal with things and address them before you reach your boiling point and act out of character. Remember, one of the fruits of the spirit is self-control.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23 NKJV
No-vember
It’s all fun and games when God is sending out blessings, but what about when the Holy Spirit tells you no to something.
Y’all I’m in a season where I’m focused on stewardship. Pray for me because I’m not okay. 😩😂😂😂
What is stewardship?
I’m glad you asked. Lol. The short definition of stewardship is managing the property or affairs of someone else. God has given us all talents, gifts, and resources and it is our responsibility to be a good steward of all the things he has given us.
So I’ve shared I love to travel. However, it can be an expensive hobby. Y’all it’s one thing not to be able to afford a trip, but what if Holy Spirit tells you “no” you can miss out on a trip and save all the money you were going to use for traveling? 😩
Of course, I wasn’t happy about it, but I know it is for my good. I’m learning stewardship requires discipline. And discipline leads to living a life of freedom. However, in the meantime, while you are cultivating a disciplined lifestyle - it involves saying no to yourself and others, which to be honest isn’t fun at all.But, I’ve decided I rather be a good steward of the things God has given me, so he can trust me with more.
Question: What’s something you had to say no to - to be a good steward and live a disciplined life?
“Yours, Lord, is the greatness, the power, the glory, the victory, and the majesty, indeed everything that is in the heavens and on the earth; Yours is the dominion, Lord, and You exalt Yourself as head overall. Both riches and honor come from You, and You rule over all, and in Your hand is power and might; and it lies in Your hand to make great and to strengthen everyone.”
1 Chronicles 29:11-12 NASB2020
The Secret Place
I know there are so many fear stories, but what about fear due to a real-life traumatic experience. 😩 I’ll share a personal story with y’all.
Storytime: When I was younger - elementary school age, I remember being at a cookout at someone’s house who had a pool and someone thought it would be cool to throw me in the pool. Y’all, I high key thought I was going to drown and thankfully, someone saw me panicking and helped.
As you can see - this was the beginning of my fear of drowning - which is absurd because I love water, the beach, and pools. But my fear of drowning still feels so real to me.
I’m sure you are wondering why I’m sharing this - so I’ll explain. I had a dream the other day about something I was fearful of. To be honest I forgot this was something I hadn’t worked through and it felt so real in the dream - it woke me up and I grabbed my phone and searched for scriptures on fear and found this one below and it helped me tremendously.
“He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.” Psalm 91:1 KJV
First off: Psalms 91 - is all about God’s protection and safety. If you are ever feeling like you need protection, I highly recommend you read the entire chapter until it comforts you.
However, this scripture really stuck out to me because it reminded me there’s so much safety in God. He wants us to dwell in his presence and he will calm all of our fears, even if they were from prior experiences.
Happy National Author’s Day!
Listen, I love a good National day. I honestly completely forgot about one of my favorite’s until a friend reminded me! It’s National Author’s Day!!! 📚
As I think about this day I’m reminded of my why for my blog. When I first started blogging in 2017, I had no idea I would publish a book or a second book with a third in the works! My initial why at that time was I wanted to complete a 60-day fitness challenge and document it to help others. Fast forward until today and my why hasn’t changed - I want to help others. While my mediums for helping others may change due to different assignments my purpose and reason for starting this page remains the same. I’m grateful I get to share my experiences with all of you through my writings.
So, to all the authors, future authors and our beloved readers cheer to you!
P.S. In case you haven’t purchased one of my books, here’s the links! 🥰
Things I Learned Before I Turned 31
My Self-Publishing Secrets: Lawrencia’s Self-Publishing Blueprint
You always have to plug yourself!
There’s No I in Team
Growing up in a low-income area, many children including myself had limited options due to poverty being all around us. We learned survival and coping skills at an early age due to exposure to so many things in our neighborhood. However, we knew there was something bigger, which encouraged us to dream larger than what we could see. For us this was sports.
The guys and I quickly learned when we were able to connect with others playing sports it created a common ground. Sports was the only place where our ethnicity or our family's financial status didn’t matter. At that moment we all came together to enjoy the sport.
Sports gave us hope. It provided us the ability to dream, see potential, and possibly change the trajectory of our lives. We even saw generational wealth created - just from playing sports.
I’ve often heard the quote, there’s no I in team, but I truly felt when we played sports it allowed us to make new friends have coaches, mentors, and teammates - who were part of our extended family.
As a former athlete myself, I’ve seen many witness the positive impact sports had on the trajectory of a child’s life.
Would you consider changing the trajectory of a child’s life and investing in their future?
New Friends or Nah?
At the beautiful age of 33, I can honestly say I’m blessed to have amazing friends in my life. But, what about when we meet new people, do we embrace them or do we say no new friends? 🤔
My Pastor often says all new relationships begin with an awkward hello. After that introduction, both people get to decide if they want to cultivate the relationship or leave it as is.
Making new friends can be interesting at any age, but especially after 30. 😂Sometimes friendships blossom easily and others may take a little more time. One thing I’ve learned that’s important in any friendship is to know what you need and also know what you are capable of giving to others. Don’t force yourself to be overextended.
Because friendships can have so much influence on your life, it’s okay not to be everyone’s friend. I’m going to repeat that for the people in the back: everyone is not your friend! It’s healthy to be selective in your friendships. I’ll share 3 things that I try to do when I’m considering someone as a new friend.
3 Friendly Habits
- Establish common ground and use this to set up a met up or spark conversation (what hobbies, interests do you all have in common)
- Check on them (A weekly follow-up such as how is your week going, what are you doing this weekend, etc…)
- Be friendly and open-minded to people who aren’t your typical friend. If they extend an invite for coffee and you can go - accept and get to know them. If it doesn’t work out, that’s okay. At least you tried!
A couple of my friendships started with people I didn’t think would be my friend and years later - we are still friends!
Are you open to making new friends? Why or why not?
“My intercessor is my friend as my eyes pour out tears to God; on behalf of a man he pleads with God as one pleads for a friend.” Job 16:20-21 NIV
GFFL
Every year I have a renewed faith in the Cowboys. Like every single year. For me as a fan, it doesn’t matter to me the last time the Cowboys won a Super Bowl or even if they went to the playoffs the previous year. The only thing that matters is - a new season has begun; therefore my faith for another winning season is renewed.
Storytime: September 9, 2021, was the kickoff game for the NFL season and of course my team the Cowboys were playing and I’m excited. To show my excitement, I even wore Cowboys gear while working from home, virtually. #mindyourbusiness😂
Anywho, while I was going back and forth with some Cowboys haters on social media, the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said if only your faith was renewed in me every time things didn’t go as you prayed. I’m like say what?!!! 🙃
I’m thinking man, God knows how to snatch my edges. 😂 Does he talk to y’all like this too? Lol.
But he’s so right - we pray for things to go one way and God has a different plan and then we are lowkey upset about it. But what if every time we felt disappointed by God because we didn’t get our way (which probably wasn’t the best decision anyway), we decide to renew our faith in him. Because just like I continue to give the Cowboys another chance - he’s the God of another chance for us! He continues to forgive us over and over again. And he can make everything that happens to me work for my good! 🥰
Would you consider being a God Fan For Life (GFFL)?
“This I recall to my mind, Therefore have I hope. It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, Because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: Great is thy faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:21-23 KJV
Watch Your Mood
I was listening to a sermon by Dr. Darius Daniels entitled, Mood to Movement. In the sermon, he talked about how your mood (your emotions) can impact your movement. I felt convicted because I immediately thought about past situations in which my negative mood interfered with my movement.
Y’all want an example? Okay, good. I’ll share.?
Storytime: Some of y’all aren’t going to believe this, but I used to go from 0 to 100 in a matter of moments. ?
One embarrassing moment I can remember from about 12 years ago is when I was at a department store and I was trying to purchase a skirt set for an internship interview. Y’all the skirt set was on the rack together and it fit me perfectly. When it was time for me to pay, the cashier told me I couldn’t purchase the items because the skirt and blazer were different sizes. Y’all my mood changed drastically. I went from being excited about finding my interview outfit to immediately being upset at this lady. Shamefully, my mood changed my disposition and everything else. ? Thankfully, my sister was there with me and she saved the day.
Side note: Because of my sister’s calm mood, I was able to get the suit and I was hired for the internship as well! ??
But what if my sister wasn’t there - I could have allowed my mood to impact a moment - which would have impacted my coin flow in college.
I could have gotten the suit without my sister’s help if I would not have allowed my mood to impact my movement and mouth.
Question: How have you allowed your mood to impact your movement?
“Don’t be quick to fly off the handle. Anger boomerangs. You can spot a fool by the lumps on his head.” Ecclesiastes 7:9 MSG
Unhurried
My friend was teaching me words and phrases in French such as my name is and how are you.
I would tell y’all how to say it, but you can ask Siri or Google - I’m still working on my pronunciation. ?
I remember asking them a question, in which they replied in French saying I’ll do it later. So I asked, how do you say now or immediately and they explained certain words don’t translate from English to French. Based on their culture they are never in a rush, they take their time to relax and enjoy moments. They also explained rushing and doing things in a hurry is a concept learned in America. I was taken back by this, but I started to ponder about this because a Bible study I attended a few days earlier - spoke about the art of rest and additionally my pastor recently completed a series about rest. #mindblown
Isn’t it interesting that Jesus never hurried to get anywhere, he always took his time?
When he heard Lazarus was dying - he delayed a few days and took his time making it back to his friends.
Or when the storm was happening on the boat, Jesus was unbothered and was asleep. Listen, that’s the kind of peace I want to have - where you can rest in the middle of the storm.
As my vacation ends, I’m going to continue to operate from a place of rest - not striving, not over hurrying, but resting! I hope you guys can feel how restful my vacation was through this photo.
Question of the week: How can you un-hurry this week and slow down?
Yellow Brick Road
Every day we have to make so many decisions. Google stated on an average day, we make over 35,000 decisions a day. That’s a lot! Some of the decisions are easy, like getting out of bed or eat this for lunch, etc… But other decisions are tough and may require us to seek our Heavenly Father for help. One of my go to scriptures for when I’m seeking direction is:
“Your word is a lamp to my feet And a light to my path.” Psalms 119:105 NASB2020
When I read scriptures, I like to dissect them. I study each word intentionally and think about the visual illustration which is provided.
I’m going to share with y’all the visual I see when I read this scripture: God's words are like a lamp I carry when I’m going through a dark place. Without the words of God being my lamp, there’s darkness - I can’t see my next step. But with the words of God he provides a lamp - which is a light in a dark place and I’m able to see the path he wants me to take. Honestly, when I read this - it is as God is saying to me follow this yellow brick road that I have paved and lit up just for you.
So my encouragement for you is that if you are unsure of what path to take with a decision allow God to be your lamp and light up the path he wants you to take.
Repurpose
This blog was inspired by a conversation with a friend.
Storytime: I was sharing my birthday photos with a friend and was letting her know the story behind my dress in the photo. I explained I purchased this beautiful dress in February of 2020 to wear for a friend’s Birthday photo photoshoot in Paris. Then Covid happened. My trip planned for March 2020 was postponed to July 2020 and then it was eventually canceled. Woosah.
I’m sure like me, we all remember when we thought Covid would be over in a month or two, and unfortunately, it is currently still ongoing- and launched into a full global pandemic. That’s still mind-boggling.
But any-who, what was I supposed to do with this beautiful dress? I couldn’t return it. Therefore, I decided to repurpose the dress and wear it as my birthday dress. Whoop! ??
So, what are you supposed to do with your events planned or outfits you haven’t worn due to the pandemic? - You repurpose it!
Turn the event into a zoom event, wear the outfit to your living room party or a random mailbox trip, or a Tuesday at the park. Remember you don’t need a reason or a special occasion to wear something - wear it or celebrate it whenever you want!
Tuning out the Noise
So, I’m a huge fan of the Olympics. It’s amazing to watch people from around the world who trained vigorously compete against the world’s best.
Fun fact: I binged watched as many hours of the Olympics as I could this weekend. My favorite competitions are the synchronized divers, gymnastics, and track and field.
Sorry, I digressed. ? But, while watching the Olympics I realized a majority of the Athletics wore noise-canceling headphones or AirPods before their event began. While the arenas were closed to outside fans, I’m sure it was still very loud in the stadium and they needed to concentrate and not be distracted by outside noise from announcers, other competitors, etc…
I thought to myself, how often do I sit, disconnect from the noise and tune into what God is saying. Well, starting in August, I’m going to do just that. I’ll be off social media for a while to silence some noise and will be spending more time with God. Remember, it’s important to be intentional and prioritize our relationship with God over things. It’s hard to hear God’s soft gentle voice if there’s a lot of noise.
“and after the earthquake a fire; but the LORD was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice.” 1 Kings 19:12 KJV